Dear Prayer Warriors,
I invite you again to join in our battles with the knowledge that what God has sown in us is greater and eternal, unlike the many things happening to us currently. The wrath of Satan, the temporary afflictions of this world may keep me trembling a bit, but I remember before Jesus being Lord and King over me, those things kept me defeated. I know now that Satan is the one defeated for those covered in the blood of the Lamb. Instead of defeat, God superintends all dark matters to bring forth His grace, His treasure, similar to how a diamond is made through time, darkness, and pressure. This is the climate in which we sow our seed and wait, but what about our reaping? I pray this Scripture passage would represent our reaping:
“Therefore, we do not lose heart. Even though our outward man is perishing, yet the inward man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, is working for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory, while we do not look at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary, but the things which are not seen are eternal.” 2 Cor 4:16-18
Rejoice that the Lord Shepherds us. Praise the Lord that His Word is stable ground to stay on. The Bible is where eternal joy grows, springing into a harvest of contentment within me! Bless Jesus in recognition that His Body the Church, ministers to us in prayers which is an eternal exercise covering many temporary things. I am so encouraged to know that you are in the trenches with us, your prayers give way to the Lord’s hand of hope, His pathway of blessing, and helps us persevere to victory knowing now things are hard. It is the Holy Spirit that envisions us going from glory to glory to glory, may it be so. I desired to write sooner as I felt many times only prayer was going to help us stand our ground. I know too that God sees our needs and meets them even if I haven’t dispatched the latest communication.
Since I last wrote you, Anna has had another UTI. That is her 4th in 9 months. We met with a urologist; she hesitates to treat Anna’s UTI’s because diapering tends to create a baseline of bacteria in her urine. Only severe cultures ought to be treated to keep the antibiotics efficacious. So, it seems her body will always be fighting off infection down there. Juxtaposed on that, was a viral illness that inflamed Anna’s lungs. On the first day of being sick, Anna's every exhale was a cough for about 16 hours no matter the repositioning or suctioning. The following night Anna’s became completely lethargic, her heart rate was in the 50’s awake. Her normal heart rate awake is between 100-120. We were one foot out the door to the hospital when we realized that the doctor that day prescribed a max dose steroid that can affect the heart. That was compounded with the excess potassium from being on Pedialyte for three days. We prayed for wisdom and direction because we usually know what to do, this was all new. We played with her limp hands, repositioned her dead weight and floppy heat, we read the Bible, and sang. Lindsey did most the heavy lifting that night. Around 4 AM the steroid flushed out of her system and her heart rate normalized. Today she has a few lingering issues and hasn’t required much extra intervention at night, we do hope for a nurse to help us particularly when these struggles hit.
Somewhere in there our fridge gave up on us. We had some heroic neighbors rent a truck and pick up a $25 fridge to hold us over, this was all done while I was at work. They would tell you it’s not them, but rather Christ in them that caused them to leap into action.
Mother’s Day proved surprisingly hard for me because I felt like my hands were tied. I guess it served as a sign that I truly love my bride. I wished Father’s Day would have come first. I did my best to listen and encourage. I felt helpless, I like I couldn’t steer the day intentionally like most the other holidays and the fajitas I cooked were dry. Praise the Lord for Lindsey’s mom who shared the day with us. I watched Lindsey confront our loss and praise God for our other children. She knows good and well that Simon lives on, hidden in Christ.
The return to horseback therapy proved hard even for Renee. She kept her head down until one of the volunteers had a heart to heart with her and convinced her to get up on the horse again. Even there, we could see seeds of God working in Victor’s mind’s eye as he remained fixated on all that was going on at the ranch. Many people there encouraged us to think of horses as a conduit for healing for our family.
We are seeking the Lord about how He would like to heal our hearts through counseling. I continue to meet with a pastor weekly, though we are currently on a little break. Lindsey and I continue to look for options for Renee. Renee has persisted in pretend-playing death scenarios daily with her toys. She also pretends to be someone else (like a mom) frequently. She had a moment where she destroyed a worm. I know her 4-year-old mind is working to understand what death is and the permanence it gives in the material world. But what are the guardrails of healthy play therapy? What should we look for, what needs to be in place? We found a Christian counseling center that specializes in helping foster kids mainly, they are grief experts and play based, we have yet to be scheduled in there.
Two days ago my mother fell again, the second time in one month. She broke her hip a third time in three years. The first two were slight fractures. This one is more concerning. They hesitate operating because of her age. I don’t know how soon assisted living will turn into nursing home care. It’s hard to connect with her. My mom spent last weekend with us, and admitted to thinking about nothing all the time. It is concerning how much she sleeps. Praise God i have a lovely memory of Renee playing bingo with her this past weekend.
We have been preparing an event for the 5th of July marking the first anniversary of Simon getting bit. It will be a remarkable time of remembering, rejoicing, thanking, and commemorating. These preparations have stirred fresh tears. God has put it on my heart to be vigilant and available to those that are struggling with grief over Simon’s passing. Whether it’s my family members or Simon’s co-op classmates or Bible study friends. Many throughout the year have expressed an unknowingness of what to do. And I want to comfort them with the comfort of Christ that I have received. I say this as a vision and something that God would bring forth because just yesterday, I had another wave of weeping and crying out to God about Simon's absence in our family.
In one month, Lord willing, we will be leaving to a weeklong family respite retreat put on by Joni and friends, this will lead into the anniversary of Simon's death. Glory to God who laid this retreat on the hearts of some of my friends. They chose to pay our way for our entire family! We are humbled by the continued assurance that God has got us and is with us.
Please pray for:
-God to satisfy Renee's struggles with Simon's death. May we point her to the Bible to help her see the biblical truth that God is our counselor and that stewarding all life matters to Him. Pray that she would trust Who holds the keys of death and grave.
-us as we are awaiting to reap the harvest of joy that Jesus intends to bring us because we have sown the seed of tears. We are returning with singing. This is from Psalm 126:5-6 which has been above our kitchen sink for most of this year.
- wisdom and strength for my brother Will who works constantly to care for my mother and her difficult situation. For the Lord to give my mom the peace of her faith in Jesus knowing His sufficiency.
- continued healing through horseback therapy for Anna. And horsemanship in general for all of us. That this Reigning Hope ranch and therapy community would gather around us with the love of Jesus.
- a night nurse and general health for Anna.
Indebted,
Nic for the Currats
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