Dear Prayer Warriors,
Righteous Renee
There’s a tremendous gift inside my house reminding me that change is possible. A little over a year ago, our precious Renee was averaging one melt down per day. By that I mean a racing, manic mind swallowed up in moments of discontent. Renee had flailing limbs, yelling, and weeping over trivial things, over important things, and anything that would challenge her will. I always leaned on consequences and discipline, insisting on submission. Lindsey estimated Renee’s heart more, she had empathy, applied grace and showed mercy more carefully. Lindsey could see how our third born was in many ways stepping into the role of firstborn for her little brother Victor. Renee didn’t sign up for that, but praise the Lord she has been given grace for this! I remember a little over a year ago we were exasperated, desperately searching for mercy and help for Renee’s struggles. I can say now that we have become equipped and all of us were found teachable. Thank you for praying. What a difficult trauma Renee had to walk through.
On the first Saturday of this new year, Renee stayed in the church sanctuary instead of going to children’s church. She heard the pastor talk about being born again and whispered to me “I want to be born again.” We prayed together for Christ to forgive her of her sins because of His cross and resurrection. We prayed that God would make her born again into a living faith. She invited Jesus on the throne of her life. We took communion together. Since then, we have had conversations of what it looks like to count the cost of discipleship, to carry our cross, to live for Jesus and to grow in daily prayer and Bible reading. With the Lord nothing is wasted! In addition to this precious moment, I can recall two more extrabiblical seeds planted in her this past year aiding and leading up to trusting God.
The first one being the fictional life of Little Christiana. We were given volume two of the Little Pilgrim’s Big Journey. None of us had read the Pilgrim’s Progress in any form before, so we were all equally engrossed in it. This version for younger kids placed many relevant Scriptures along the Pilgrim’s path. There are many parallels to make this “hit home” with Renee. Christiana is a little girl whose older brother Christian journeyed to the Celestial City and is no longer with her. In his absence she remembers her brother’s invitation to go with him and to read the King’s book. Upon an invitation from the same man her brother met named Evangelist, Christiana resolves to leave her hometown called Destruction, and to walk the pilgrim path named Difficulty to the Celestial City. She takes her younger brothers with her, they enter the Narrow Gate and advance toward the place of Deliverance, where burdens are removed because of what the King’s Son did for them. The pilgrims keep onward walking a path whose walls are salvation. They are distracted, tempted and enticed from the path by people with names like Mrs. Fear, Impatience, and Discontent. They wander through places like the Bog of Despond or Doubting Castle. Thankfully they also meet people named Lady Wisdom, Great Heart and Good-Will. This adventure helped Renee wonder and awe at a reunion with Simon. It served us well to see that prayers do get answered, rescuing happens, and God’s Word guides when we need help. She understood that following Jesus is difficult but God gives us all we need. Lastly, Renee became very keen on what deception is thanks to this book. I praise God for this wonderful help that fixes our aim on the Kingdom of Heaven.
Our second extrabiblical aide arrived last Spring, we found a Christian psychiatrist specializing in play-based child counseling. Renee attended every week for almost a year, her last session will be this coming Monday. The Psychiatrist concluded that a discharge was appropriate citing Renee’s maturity in having processed the trauma of being present when Simon was bit. She added that Renee understood Simon’s death and has applied faith in knowing where he is. Lindsey and I were unsure of what to make of all this so we have been watching her. She still operates with a high energy and behaves without too much consideration of others or of possible consequences. I think that is not too unusual for someone her age. We celebrated her 5th birthday last month. Praise God.
Anna Unlimited
One of the worship songs we sang this last week said “In the waiting, You get the glory. In the healing, You get the glory.” I can think of no clearer statement to sum up surrendering Anna to the Lord for the last 10 years. I invite anyone to coffee with me who believes that God is only glorified in healing because I have found that in the waiting my Shepherd gets the Glory also. Instant supernatural healing became like an idol for me at times. Should it happen, would it be a brilliant bolt of lightning in the night to be talked about for years to come forever changing Anna’s trajectory. By contrast, obedient faith in waiting is more like the sun. It becomes a perpetual light certain that Anna will be healed when it pleases God most because He said He would. This continuous light gets experienced everyday, not just once. Yes our outside is wasting away because of disability, but inwardly God’s Word becomes strength and hope for the lame and their parents. This is a glorious light, it outlasts, it requires abiding. In truth sometimes the circumstances of Anna’s care is such that you have a hard time reconciling God’s goodness to what we are going through, yet God’s Word is faithful in building us up. It is a comfort even for considering salvation and rescue for those who cannot express their cognition of sin and needing a Savior because of their injuries. Here are two verses about the Last Day that comfort me in God’s mindfulness about the disabled.
“Behold, at that time I will deal
with all your oppressors.
And I will save the lame
and gather the outcast,
and I will change their shame into praise
and renown in all the earth.”
Zephaniah 3:19
Micah 4:6-7
Anna’s 10! We crossed that day with great joy and gladness for Anna’s life. This stood in radical contrast to the actual day and trial of her birth. Seven weeks after Anna’s birth, Lindsey and I finally brought her home. Anna’s traumatic birth racked up an $800,000 hospital bill. Finally, we could move beyond the unnatural chapter of leaving Anna at the hospital every night and we could stay by her side. We brought her home to our basement apartment in the Albany Park neighborhood of Chicago. It’s absurd to recall just how assuring our doctors were about the pregnancy, “everything is going great.” Anna stopped moving in the womb at 34 weeks, Anna came into this world through emergency c-section, motionless, and in silence seemingly still born. But God brought life! He stabilized her blood pressure, ended seizures, guided the hand of a brain surgeon, and helped us answer questions about the meaning of life when the doctors probed our willingness to carry on as Anna’s parents given her prognosis. We did experience odd defying, merciful miracles during this time that brought Anna betterment. It’s the Holy Spirit that met us each day. Our church body ministered to us. I still remember the songs of Fernando Ortega drawing reflective faith from me during those uncertain times. It goes without saying: I was greatly afraid of being away from the hospital with Anna under my responsibility.
Anna’s birth day and the two months after were some of the hardest times of my life. I never wept so much in my life, or had all my first-time parent hopes dashed. In hindsight, the 7 week crucible at that Northshore hospital brought healing to our marriage, unifying us in prayer, directing us to fix my eye on Jesus. Our faith never blamed God but always asked for help and depended on Him. He is faithful!! We count on His purpose and His Word. Now, ten years later, our family looks forward to that calendar day expectant of great fun and joy, hooray for Anna’s birthday! This year we went up to the mountains for sledding, cross-country skiing, swimming and roller skating. Anna had so much fun. What a blessing from God that our life is more about these things, these days. Hallelujah.
Please Pray for:
- Another child. We are entering into the later years of eligibility in human terms, but our hearts desire is for another child. If it pleases the Lord, may He bless us in this way. We remain totally surrendered to His will with or without another such gift.
- Renee’s faith to be fanned and fed. For her boldness in being her brother and sister’s keeper. That footholds of death or trauma would melt away in exchange for the praise of Christ and His healing.
- God’s continued testimony of His glory in our waiting for Anna’s healing. Which is never wasted.
Thanks for praying,
Nic for the Currats
