Caring for the Lame and Elderly

Dear Prayer Warriors,

Thank you for praying and reading. Anna is doing good, she’s healthy and joyful. Praise the Lord for the large number of healthy days Anna has had.

In writing the previous update, I remember praying about what to write because all acute medical problems remain away from us.  The topic ended up being about believing God for full healing and praying through unbelief. The following day I was attacked by vivid thoughts of Anna’s passing. Almost like our asking for full healing was only going to happen by her passing. The phrase “be careful what you wished for” kept taunting me. What fear gripped me for an afternoon. I remember crying out to God, pleading the protection of Christ over this spiritual attack. I knew I was being deceived and tempted to forsake God. I also was reminded to not covet healing through this experience. then God in His grace, reminded me of how many hardships He brought us through, and how He has placed Anna in our care for His glory and will always give us what we need to meet her needs.  

Today I wanted to share my experiences in training to become Anna’s caretaker officially. I completed the Certified Nurse Assistant program, thanks be to God. The state board exam is coming in early December. The journey included two ten hour shifts in a nursing home. So much of what the residents endure there challenged my faith. I have never thought much about end of life care and even less about what the nurses go through to meet the needs there. I was so impressed by the CNA I was training with, he had such a focus, professionalism, and sense of service (not bad for an 18-year-old).

On the sweet side, I had conversations with residents about God’s faithfulness through the years, I enjoyed hearing how some served Him so well. The reality of my experience was more about meeting basic needs, cleaning, and caring for 8 residents one after the other. So many call lights to follow up with. It made me think of how God responds to all of our call lights simultaneously, and how He replies graciously by giving to those who cannot repay Him. Perhaps my heart looked more like my Savior’s that weekend as I served those who could not pay me back. It’s a noble job to preserve dignity and “the image of God” in those with failing minds and bodies. Humility is a two-way street at the nursing home. I was thankful when it was over because it felt like something far removed from my goal of taking care of Anna. In thinking about it some more, I do give the same care for Anna that I did for the old folks: I dress her, bathe her, lift her, reposition her, feed her, and change her diapers it just seemed so different.

On my way to class one day, I heard a pastor on the radio respond to a caller asking him how she can know if her special needs brothers are saved. I wrestled with this thought probably two years ago regarding Anna and never considered what the pastor suggested. In the simplest of ways, he referenced Hebrews 4:12 “For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.” Without knowing the specifics, the pastor said “read the Bible to them.” And from within me came the conviction to reprioritize this in my time with Anna. So please pray with me that the Holy Spirit would remind me to read the Bible to Anna that He would work through this seemingly little act to make anna rejoice in the God of her Salvation. I fully trust Jesus for her salvation and I cling to specific Bible passages regarding His provision of salvation for the lame. What a wonderful savior.

Please Pray for:

-the spiritual strengthening of our family devotion times now that I am home again at night.

-the continuation of good health and increasing ability for Anna.

-adaptive toys that would engage Anna to use her hands and eyes.

- the health of baby #3 as we enter the third trimester and for a safe delivery.

-a friend to come alongside her and spend time getting to know her.

Thanks in the name of Jesus,

The Currat’s

A Trophy of God's Grace

Dear Prayer Warriors, 

Thank you for reading and praying. Knowing you are praying encourages and invigorates our walk of faith. it builds us up to trust God for His purposes in our family. Anna has struggled with a sinus cold the last few days. This means breaking out the suction machine, cleaning the humidifiers, increasing the repositioning at night, and remembering the patience it takes for Anna to go through a virus. For me those middle of the night coughs seem discouraging and when mixed with sleeplessness can make for a long night. Thankfully I have the Holy Spirit inside helping me to surrender my grumbling and wait it out. Please pray for God’s grace, healing, and mercy to outlast the illness, care-taking demands, and bring full health surprisingly soon.

I have learned to thank God for the sleep I get rather than focus on the sleep I didn’t get. Meeting with God in the mornings has a way of feeding my spirit for the duration of each day. Literally asking the Holy Spirit to lead my day has been formative in helping me desire and pray according to His will -not just for things I “want”. This time cultivates blessed dependence and it is going to be a fight to preserve it this coming month. Pray for this time to not be compromised. 

Today I start my month of night classes to become a Certified Nurses Assistant. This will be on top of working full time. We are counting on the grace and strength that God gives to help combat this time of stretching and sacrifice. Lindsey will be by herself to care for our three children all day until bedtime. My prayer “want” is for Simon to be more compliant with the bedtime routines and out of energy come bedtime. Another complicated side to this is that our night nursing care has gone from 5 nights a week to 3. Pray for the right nurse to come help us for another 2-3 nights. 

I once again ask you to fervently pray for full healing for Anna’s brain and neurological system. Pray for God to be honored in the life of Anna through the gifting of her abilities. This type of prayer request is based on what the God biblically does and can do, this is not a prayer request based on my own understandings.  I realize that I could be asking you to do far more than your own understanding allows. However, I do believe that it is a bold prayer in accordance with God’s will and promise. May this prayer stretch us, I’m leaving the results up to “God’s greater glory playbook.” I enjoy caring for Anna’s needs because God equips us for this, so if the healing is delayed I know how to carry on. I wanted to skip the bullet-point list of requests today and ask for the Holy Spirit to burden you with the prayer requests interwoven. Mostly pray for God to glorify Himself as it pleases Him regarding His sweet Anna pie. 

Occasionally I have prayer warriors tell me that they have seen Anna walk, dance, run, and/or talk in a dream or a vision while praying for Anna. These accounts are not hurtful and don’t discourage me, they affirm what God can do. “Help our unbelief Lord because we believe.” Who can envision Anna holding up her head, sitting independently across from you at a table, looking at you in the eyes, and sharing her testimony of how God continues to shine His power through her as he does through our cracked jars of clay?

For greater testimonies of God’s glory,

the Currats

Lamenting Turns Sweet

Dear Prayer Warriors,

I remember the first time I touched Anna. It was after many doctors and nurses, about an hour after she had been born in silence, motionless. Lindsey had just been moved to a room and the birth doctors came in one after another and gave us post-operation updates. They wanted permission to transfer Anna to a hospital that has a Neonatal intensive care unit (NICU). Immediately after consent we got a phone call from the head Neonatologist at the other hospital asking to do a hypothermia treatment to slow the circulation of blood running through her brain. Anna had toxic, acidic blood running through her body which indicated hypoxic ischemia (lack of oxygen in the blood). I remember being on the phone asking simple knee jerk questions about it like “Is it necessary?” or “would you do it if it was your kid?” I repeated to Lindsey everything the doctor was telling me over the phone. Amid all these events unfolding incredibly fast, Lindsey and I did not have a second to ourselves. After all this, I was invited to the nursery to meet Anna without Lindsey.

Anna was intubated and gaining strength under a heat lamp in the nursery.  I was afraid to touch her because she was motionless, the wires and tubes seemed so delicate. The doctor encouraged me burrow my finger into Anna’s tiny hand. It must have been the first touch Anna got without plastic gloves. I placed my left pinky finger in the preemie palm of her left hand and sang the hymn, Wonderful Grace of Jesus. It was a song we sang around her in utero almost every day. For the months leading up, Anna had become familiar with the joyous tune of that hymn. That day the song came out of my trembling mouth, choppy, I was weeping and yet the words and melody of the song were strengthening my broken heartedness. In response, Anna tightened her fingers around my pinky and opened her eyes for the first time. This was miraculous.

I told Anna many words of affirmation, “spoke life” into her, I prayed over her, and the joy of being a first-time father flooded the scene. God gave me awe and wonder at the features I spent 6 and a half months wondering about, but now see them for the first time. That energized my heart. What a Shepherd our God is on the days of greatest trial! Next, we had to place Anna on the alter of the Lord as we remained at the birth hospital without her. Lindsey was afforded only a toe touch as Anna was being wheeled into the ambulance. My heart breaks for how much harder this all was for Lindsey. She didn’t see Anna for another two days until her discharge while I was going back and forth from the hospitals.

By God’s grace I feel encouraged recalling these things and remembering the joy of connecting with Anna that first time amid the frenzy. We don’t harbor a dark closet of unforgiveness, anger, or resentment toward God regarding Anna and her injuries. I know that much of these prayer emails contain lamenting before the Lord, at times it can seem like we are despairing, and sometimes I sin by writing from that emotional state without the Spirit’s bridle and sending the prayer requests in haste. Nonetheless, the language of lamenting through our trial, sharing it for prayer, and remembering it; has been very productive in keeping us in love with God. We want all credit, praise, and glory to go to God. He has used our lament to refine our souls, rather than harden our hearts. We are His.  That is sweetness in lamenting.  God’s grace producing from our weakness and neediness a testimony for His glory. I felt prompted to dig up the very first prayer request I sent the day after Anna’s birth. Upon rereading this I see the Spirit of Christ in the tone, there is no jumping to conclusions, I see a hopeful first-time dad just asking for prayer. Here is the first update, the subject line read: Anna Elizabeth Currat.

“Thank you to all our prayer warriors out there. It is with joy and faith in God's plan that we welcomed Anna Elizabeth into the world Sunday morning at 9:46. She was at 34 weeks 4 days. She is 4lbs 9ounces. Lindsey had an emergency c-section because the baby was not responding to a non-stress test. But praise God for her heart beat. That was the only thing that was going strong. The umbilical chord was wrapped around her neck twice, minimizing the flow of oxygen and nutrients from Lindsey. She had also passed meconium, a sign that she was distressed.

Lindsey and I in need of rest. We are at Swedish covenant hospital, and our baby, sweet Anna, is at Evanston hospital where they have a great neo-natal care team. Anna is in critical condition because there is acid in her blood that she need to metabolically process out. In order to do that, her organs need to be working a bit more than they are now. She is also on a respirator because her lungs are weak. It's a 72 hour wait before any full assessment. 

Lindsey's mom is coming out from Seattle. There are some glorious stories about God's providence and timing that I am leaving out. Lets call upon The Lord to send His Spirit to hover over us. Things are fragile and in Gods hands.

Bless you.

Nic and Lindsey, and Anna

Specific prayers:

For the metabolic processing of the acid

Against brain damage

For her lungs to work strongly

For Anna's organs to continue to mature

For God to be her peace and comfort; she must be so scared

For Nic and Lindsey as shock wears off and reality sets in, may we remain hopeful

For Lindsey's incision to heal quickly

For a good milk supply for Lindsey when Anna is ready to eat

That  we would get to hold her sometime soon”

Thank you for praying us into the Lord for years, placing us in the pathway of His blessings, what a Good Shepherd!

The Currat’s

Is Anything Too Difficult for God?

Dear Prayer Warrior,

Remember our last update asking prayer for the many decisions before us? Thank you for praying, God has straightened our paths and sharpened our plans.  Lindsey wrote down two possible schedules of what it would look like to have Anna in school or not. It became clear that going to school would be too big a burden. Especially when factoring in the gracious gift of God in the form of a third child due February 8^th! We are overjoyed at the chance to love more.

So now many new considerations are forthcoming.  One of which is a change to the State Medicaid program that hires the parents to be Certified Nurses’ Assistant (CNA). Due to these changes I find it best that I get licensed and hired on as a CNA to ensure that we can get the maximum hours of charted care possible especially during the arrival of our third child. Sometime this fall I hope to enroll in some evening classes and get certified. It’s all very surprising because I never thought I would be cut out for anything in the medical field and so I’m struggling to wrap my mind around it all. The thing about follow Jesus is that He plants His Holy Spirit in me, and that Spirit is always encouraging me to change. I’ve learned that remaining teachable is healthy for my walk with Him.

Lately with Anna, I find her with a “faraway look in her eye”, wearing a passive countenance, and repeating her hand chewing. I always want to be the one to make her smile. We communicate in silly sound effects, motion, and tickles but all that seems so short lived. Perhaps my powers are fading?! It’s harder to engage and it seems to take more time to connect. She is growing and I need to study where her interests are taking her. Feelings like this make me wish we mastered a form of communication, I’m tired of guessing what she wants.  I pray that I would be more attentive to what’s piquing Anna’s interests perhaps its right under my nose.

Often there will be a charge of good aromas in the air from our cooking. Cooking takes time, time away from being with Anna, the excitement builds as the table is set, the plates are separated at the right spot, and the drink glasses are filled. Then we wheel Anna to the table to sit with us. I wonder how Anna processes all the smells of dinner without the taste? She is so gracious and pleasant to be around us eaters. What are ways we can draw her into the dinner time? We are overly focused on eating rather than what life is like in her shoes. Today I felt like the prison guard grilling a rib-eye, sautéing mushrooms and onions and eating it in front of the prisoners dreaming for a taste. Perhaps that is a bit exaggerated but help us ask God for how to better include Anna. Perhaps tastes are not out of the question, but as her parents we have become trained to assume aspiration with anything taken orally. That may not be the case anymore, perhaps we can educate her to identify herbs and spices!

The last two paragraphs seem to be a bit difficult but keep in mind good warrior there is much to praise God for:

-Anna continues to be healthy all summer long (except for that two week stretch of vomiting when I was in Honduras).

-We have a new OT named Karen who has won Anna over and she collaborates often with our PT Kendra.

-Anna has been so good at sitting almost unassisted. Another progress she is showing in PT is leaning her chest and head to one side then re-centering on her own. She is getting stronger.

-We received a sleep positioning system that will help Anna’s tone when she sleeps, its most evident when side lying and her head just whips back wanting her throat straightened. Not anymore, what fascinating technology.

-Our old OT Deann who recently retired (and is a wonderful children’s illustrator) still wants to hang out with Anna! They are planning a messy activity this Friday. What grace!  She just wants to play with her.

-We got the title and plates for the ramp van. Done deal, debt free, what an ordeal. God made a way through many steps of uncertainty. So many people to thank.

-Praise God that Lindsey no longer has to lift that 50-pound wheel chair in and out of the car.

-Praise the Lord that our needs were rapidly met for another night nurse because our primary one found a new job.

Please Pray For:

-greater interactions and one on one engaging. In writing all the praises I can’t help but notice that they are almost all practical needs for caretaking. As her father, I long to see Anna less passive (hand chewing) and more interested in connecting with her surroundings. But how?

-that God would orchestrate circumstances around our dinner times so that would Anna would be graciously involved, her sense of smell affirmed, and if tasting could be recommended.  

-the Lord to write a testimony of grace and joy in the pregnancy, labor, and delivery of our third child.

-the placenta to attach away from Lindsey’s C-section scar. The early ultrasounds show them very close. This could complicate things and make it difficult to feel the baby moving.

-the successful repair of Anna’s wheel chair. it has been off kilter since march, jamming on basic functions, etc… The company has greatly erred, delayed the repairs, and not been empathetic towards us. May we get the chair fixed, and not ruin our witness because its so easy to point fault in this company.

-a new direction to steer the assisted communicative devices for Anna. There are two options. We long to see some sort of progress.     

-hippotherapy (horseback riding) needs to return our calls there are only two companies that accept Anna’s insurance and one is far away.

-a bigger place to live, contentment for what we have, and for faith in the waiting. Pray that the Lord would show us His tender grace in His timing. That we would have eyes of faith as we do not see moving as a possibility at this time. Whether we buy or move to another rental, we ask “Is anything too hard for God?”

-“Lord stretch our heart and give us 3 baby grace”

Thank you for reading and praying it compels us onward,

The Currats