Present with the Lord

Dear prayer warriors.

In the moments before everyone is up I try to read the Bible. But lately I have been scrambling to face the day so I have been listening to the Bible, and laying there still. I can't seem to spend much time outside of the book of Psalms these days. The one heaven promise in the book of psalms that I keep coming back to is this one: "in your presence there is fullness of joy; at your right hand are pleasures forevermore." Psalm 16:11. That just fills me with wonder. 

Ever since Simon died I have been asking the Lord to fill me with His promises of heaven. Not necessarily of visions of heavenly landscapes with my son photoshopped in there. Or Simon sporting angelic wings, like he turned into another species. No, I want genuine, God's Word promises. 

Yesterday afternoon we gathered with family and sat there carefully sharing our experiences in the last 2 weeks. Lindsey started ministering to my heavenly longing in a way that I didn't see coming. She led our conversation into these truths of heaven that spoke so loudly to me. "I know Simon wont experience loneliness anymore." And like a floodgate we all started adding comments. We shared that Simon will never be deceived again, motivated by selfish ambition, ensnared by pornography, addicted to alcohol, rejected.  He will not need faith to know God. I just kept saying "Amen after each one." Simon is in a place completely absent of sin and for that I rejoice! Not just in the promises of heaven. But in the One who left heaven, humbled Himself to death so that we could go to heaven and live with God. Jesus prepared a place for Simon. Jesus Christ is his portion, His landlord forevermore. 

I read this blog every once in a while from a guy who also lost his son. And I love the way he introduces himself. He says "I am a Christian, a husband to Aileen, and a father to two girls in their teens and one son who is waiting for me in heaven." That makes a lot of sense to me. 

Renee is playing with Simon's toys more and more. She asked me this morning if we could buy her the pink version of Simon's Hot Wheels Alligator Car Wash because she liked it so much. (There is no pink version) i told her she could have this one and said "no a pink one." 

Last night, Lindsey came up from putting Renee down after a longer than usual time. Renee has been picking the books Simon would pick to read at bedtime. Lindsey let Renee go on and on as her mind rambled about missing Simon she says "he's been gone for 3 days." We really do all grieve differently.

I listened well as Lindsey opened up her sorrows to me before the Lord.

Praise the Lord for:

-the life of Simon. 2530 days give or take

-the unity among believers in helping us, praying for us and walking with us.

-heaven a place free from sin and death.

Please pray for:

- the funeral to have so great a measure of grace that our faith would be greater than our sorrow

- traveling mercies for the family and friends

- the continued laying down of our life as we imagined it to be. To take faith for today and not worry about things like Christmas 2022 and next year's birthdays. 

-those family members, neighbors,  and friends far from God, to experience His love and mercy in this time. As they join to us to remember Simon.

Thank you for praying

"And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope." 1 thes 4:13 NLT

Nic for the Currats