I work in security at a large retailer. I'm in a position to do good in my community: to find missing kids, to protect good people, to apprehend bad ones, and to make quick decisions. Without being a believer in Jesus Christ I could not perform those duties. Why you say? Because I used to be a conflict-avoiding, approval seeking stoner, that had something to say about everything generally in a sarcastic tone. The slightest thing would freak me out, set me off. At the sound of a drop of water I was fearful, living with a dualistic mind: wanting to be God-pleasing and living it up as ever-tolerant, whatever-floats-your-boat kind of guy. The God I constructed my my head and followed with my faith lead me to insanity and demonic decptions. How can that person protect others?
It took believing with all I am in Jesus Christ, trusting that moment in time when I gave my faith to Him. An act filled with pity, desperation and suffering traded for the free gift of salvation. God the father decided to see my release onto Jesus as a gift for His glory. Go figure!! That was the designed plan for post messiah times; so learning to be obedient to the Word of God is huge. Before my understanding of Jesus there is my trust in Him.
In reading the Bible I've changed my mind. I had tons of wrong thoughts thunk by emotions. Choices made out of impulsive desires. Through it all I barely cared. Today I live in hope, it heals me.
One of the universal qualities about God spoken by believers in Jesus is this: the weaknesses in character that held me back during my years in darkness have become to the stregnth God graces me with now. All this to say that with my walk in faith, God has given me this new job that places front and center deep roots of my weak character. I have to make decisions quickly. I have to have a stern indifference when customers or co-worker belittle my job title. I have to be sincere and serious, knowing when to speak and what to say. I still have a sense of whatever-floats-your-boat kind of ideal; Added onto that thought now is praying for them. I try to reveil my heart to them which contains Jesus and his amazing love.
I cannot contain God in my mind like i tried before. In His eternal wisdom and faithfulness I am contained and thought out. I am as I am to love God and others first. I got to punch in so i got to run.
