Over the weekend I left my G2 pen in my work shirt breast pocket. What a great pen that G2: plastic encasing, spring mounted clicker, rubber grip, gel ink, I even remember writing a paper in college about how superior the Bic G2 pen was amongst all the pens. Anyways, all my work shirts fall in the "whites with bleach wash" on the hot water cycle, and fast spin. After the wash, come to find: I've stained my five white work shirts with black ink. After the initial shock, I imagined the consequences and play them out in my head.
Boy is this a sign of things to come. Should I quit the retail security feild? Is God telling me to check every pocket of my clothes when I do the laundry? Like my mom used to do growing up. Clumsy, careless, and hurried that's what I think happened. The transformation of my life into the image of Christ is like me using a map and a compass to get somewhere versus using GPS in a car. God's ways are often clear, shorter and more rewarding then relying on my own understanding. In becoming a believer I've learned that God's will often comes to me:
As I prepaired to go to work in my shiny leather shoes, pressed navy blue pants and white cotton undershirt; I get a call from my boss. He orders me to get to work in street clothes because I'm training as an undercover today. How timely considering my shirts. Well God be praised, I got promoted without interview, inquiry or doubt in my boss' mind. This is no little promotion either. Half of my hourly wage got added onto what I was making hourly. What a blessing after 31/2 years of no promotion. Now in the span of six months I've recieved two. This is a testament to the regeneration of the Holy Spirit. The Bible verse EPH2:10 best sums up the victory in my life that comes in obeying God's call to draw me near.
What a whopper, make that a double whopper with cheese. I get to go to work in sweats, dye my hair green or perhaps where a suit and tie while sporting a breifcase. What an unforseen thing. -Enter now the responsibility, I have a position of authority. Romans 13 describes well what that means. This job won't work unless my every effort and willingness is aparent. I have four people under me that need to react instantly to what I say in crisis or unpopularity. To make it even harder, some of the people I'm the leader of wanted my position and find it puzzling (unmerited) that I got it.
Now comes the change in my duties. As a door security guard making your presence known is imperative. It was quite comical yesterday, the amount of times I blew my cover because I said hello to a co-worker passing by forgetting that I'm not in uniform. Neither am I to make eye contact with anyone on the sales floor. I have been called to use the power of observation combined with strict obediance to company policy to catch theifs. There's no room for grey in these decisions, and many prerequisits exist. I could loose my job overnight if I make a decision that would falsely accuse someone. All that job security of working retail seems suspended.
Praying for God to work things out in my department at work gave way to this. I didn't think it would involve me so actively. Asking the Holy Spirit of Jesus to cast out the evil influences that tempted me happened too. Now I am asked to regroup my department, define unacceptable conduct and hold accountability to people's work performance while showing Christ's love. No more cracking dice in the office or ogling after women with the camera.
Lets not ignore the fact that I need to be in a committed physical workout routine due to the physical altercations. I'm Bi-Polar too so when the manic errupts, how do I control that? God's working that out of me, I just need to remember the warning signs. Because the adrenaline is amped during an apprehension I've assisted on many with only one who resisted. The removal of fear is imperative, to transfer all that fear away from the circumstance leaving it on the cross that alone Christ resurrected from: So only God's will protects my life (harmed or unharmed). Therefore viewing the fear of God reverantly, with absolute certainty that He will and has overcome all evil circumstance. -Without that I'm scared of martial artists, theives stacked with muscle, doped-up trouble makers, or kids that gang-up and bite.
I pray for spiritual armor too. Like the Ephesians book describes. I worship and obey Jesus Christ. Righteousness is my breastplate, I use the belt of truth, helmet of salvation, I got the sheild of faith and feet for sharing the word of peace. My boss however, thinks that I (a Christian), dwell on the inherant goodness of people and that I'm not able to recognize a liar. The second one is generally true. In response to the first comment: I'm called to be a light of the Gospel and to be known by Christ's love. I don't see Christ's love in unbelievers though I try and love them. Even in the body of Christ on earth what makes me trust someone's a believer? There's not usually an outward sign.
I don't know how God will use me. What my boss might not consider is that I believe that all have fallen short because of sin and are wretched and doomed without Salvation from Jesus. I don't therefore believe in any inherant goodness in people. So to believe that anyone is capable of stealing is true. Satan spikes his demons to evoke theft in humans especially because of our materialistically hungry society. Its when Christians I know and have touched me come in to shop that my guard might be unknowingly lowered. So that will be a challenge. I ask for prayer that I grow to hate the sins of stealing/coveting/fraud/assult/kidnapping/sexual harrasment/stalking/vandalism; but choose Christ's example of loving the sinner to render me fit to do a great job and be a successful leader. I look to be stout in policy and firm in Jesus unable to bring judgement or revenge.
